23 Mar 2014

My latest trip to London for the wildlife photographer of the year award exhibition 21 March 2014

My latest trip to London for the wildlife photographer of the year award exhibition 21 March 2014

I joined our U3A photography group, a little while ago, we have visited a number of venues, but this one to London seemed particularly interesting, given the fact that I’m going on Safari in the next few months, so I was hoping that this would give me inspiration as well as be a pleasant trip out in good company. The first thing I realised was I would not be ale to achieve a full day with such an early start, so common sense made me realise that I should that I should travel down the day before and then meet up with the others.

Because I have done this trip before it was going to be easy to book the train tickets and hotels, while the train tickets were not a problem other than the fact that I adopted for E tickets and had problems printing them out, but that was quickly solved, trying to find a hotel in a suitable location, at a reasonable price was a much bigger task, but eventually I booked one with travel Lodge, which was not too far away.

I did as I had done previously and went on Facebook to where a group of friends I have in London post I mentioned my trip, for most of them, unfortunately they were unavailable on the day that I was free, which was a shame booked, I was would find other things to do, fortunately close to the date a man called Dave volunteered to meet up and show me round and Maggie, who was been brilliant in the past, at showing myself and others the sights of London, said she would also meet up, but suggested the Tower of London experience as a good place to spend a couple of hours, I had had confirmation from my U3A friends that we would be meeting on the Saturday lunchtime going for a meal and then to the exhibition, so all was arranged.

On the day there were no problems on the train, I met with Dave at Euston, we decided because I only had a backpack not to go to the hotel first but instead to travel to the tower bridge, it’s funny how the brain does not work sometimes properly, the bus we were getting on was what I believe is called the Route Master, a real old boss, complete the conductor that you boarded at the back, it wended its way through the streets of London but then seem to get stuck when we looked out of the window realise we were close to the tower, so you might as well get off, it was only then I realised the bus was something to take a photo of because there are so few of them now, unfortunately, by the time I had got my camera out it had sped off into the distance, never to be seen again.

We walked over to Tower Bridge bought our tickets and spent a couple of pleasurable hours looking at the various exhibits and taking photos, it was interesting to listen to Dave about his various trips and career and life, I had sent a text to Maggie to confirm where we were so we met at about 5 PM, just as it was starting to get dark, which gave me the opportunity to take a series of photos of the tower, Tower Bridge, the Shard and various other places illuminated at night. We then went from meal, which was quite pleasant but in the short time we were there, it quickly filled up and Maggie explained this was typical of London, I felt it was time now to book into the hotel, the other two decided they would travel with me, part of the way which was very kind of them, I could not believe the length of the queues for a ticket on the underground, but once bought there were no problems and Maggie parted with us. I think at Victoria, I really do appreciate the effort she goes to to make these trips so memorable. Dave offered to see me all the way to the hotel, so we continued to Euston and then walked to the hotel, luckily he was able to use his phone and Google maps to find it for us, once booked in I parted with Dave and said I would be in touch when I got back home, but thanked him for his time and effort and kindness.

Went to my room it was a very basic compared to some I had been in, but there again, given its location, not too expensive, luckily it had a bath so I could have a good soak and a drink of tea before resting and watching TV before going to sleep. The hotel did say on its website that there was some traffic noise, even without my hearing aids with the window closed, it was still intrusive, but initially I slept quite well,despite the strange bed that seemed to rock, but woke in the early hours, so found it difficult to get back to sleep again. Eventually did. I got up about eight get washed and dressed, then went looking for somewhere for breakfast, those of you know me will not be surprised that I ended up at McDonald’s. I then went back to the room to sort my things out, then travelled back to Euston to meet up with my U3A friends. We could not believe the queue to get down to the underground and how many people wanted a ticket, including me. Eventually, this was sorted, luckily one of us knew where we were going, so off we went. It was decided we would have a meal first which was very pleasant and again those that know me will understand when I say how pleased I was to find carrot cake was on the menu, I think if I remember correctly it was a Lebanese restaurant.

We then joined a great big long queue to get into the museum, eventually we were inside, again , lots and lots of people and lots and lots of noise, we first went to a talk by a young man who, when he was 14 had been the young wild life photographer of the year, for one so young. He was exceptionally talented and knowledgeable about his subject. We then went to look at the photo exhibition, I had never realised how dedicated some people are to their photography, the time and effort some spent looking for that elusive photo was truly incredible, having said that some of the people lived in areas of the world where it was more conducive to the photos that they took than others. After this we parted with one member who was going on elsewhere, we had a short walk round a small part of museum before it was time to go back to Euston for our train.

We had a drink and cookie there then it was time for the train, we chatted on the train so the time passed quickly, when we got back to Manchester. We got the Metro to Piccadilly gardens and just by good luck the Fountains were working, and displaying in a range of colours which were quite spectacular, so we took a few minutes to get photos before going for the other tram, at Bury. I had just missed my bus so got the taxi, then the task of unpacking doing washing and catching up with those usual day-to-day tasks. It was all a very enjoyable trip in good company, I think I would like to go back to London again maybe spend more time looking at the buildings at night time, but we will have to see.

A Totally New Adventure A Safari At Last 23 March 2014


I promised I would write a blog about the plans I had for a Safari to Africa, so here goes. I had been talking for years about a trip to go on Safari, whilst at Disney, I did go on their imitation Safari, it did have Lions, elephants, giraffes and all sorts of other animals and even had imitation poachers firing guns, but the animals seemed totally disinterested, so I thought the other thing to do is the real thing.

I started to look at holidays and the first problem was to do with medication and travel insurance because of my health issues, in particular, malaria and and malarial medication and its effects on me, the other problem was I was still being investigated for various health issues so was unable to go at that particular time. Last year, I looked again, but unfortunately needed an operation and then something else came up which would have prevented me from travelling that sort of distance, so again the trip was cancelled.

At long last, my health seems to be not too bad at present, I feel my back with the help of painkillers if needed will cope with the holiday so all I had to do them was book it. Not quite so easy as I thought it would be, it seems most people, book their holiday a year or two in advance for this sort of thing, so with only a few options with Saga who given my age and health seem to be the safest option as travel agent, as I was travelling on my own. I contacted them and discovered they had the sort of holiday, I wanted this year. In June, it would be in South Africa for nine nights (two nights flying there and back) so effectively only seven nights, this wasn’t a problem as I felt I would not be able to do a Safari every day and could rest in between.Also I decided to upgrade for the very long flight as it is 10 hours, so now in Economy Plus, bigger better seats,

I also wanted to visit Cape Town on the advice of my physio, so I mentioned this when making the booking as it seemed an exciting add-on to the holiday. The company was able to accommodate me, but the cost for three nights would have come to £1000, I did explore through the website, The Man in Seat 61 travelling from Johannesburg to Cape Town by train which would have been a 24-hour journey, but what a fantastic experience to see, unfortunately the dates did not fit in with the holiday, so in the end I decided to discard the Cape Town element maybe to look at that another year if I have enough money.

The holiday will be in the month of July, originally was going to be June, but it appears they did not have enough people, then came the next shock in the letter confirming the holiday, when it explained this is this areas winter period, so don’t forget to bring winter woollies, but also not to bring bright, white, or black clothes, so that was my wardrobe of outdoor gear totally unsuitable, but never mind. It was an excuse to buy some more clothes, while mentioning about buying it has also been a good excuse to buy a new very clever camcorder for the trip. (Still trying to work out how to use it, it’s me not it) I have made an appointment to see the nurse at the GP surgery about any inoculations etc, so I will be ready for the trip.

Well that’s a taster of the planning, I’ve paid my deposit just need to pay the balance, and wait for July to arrive, well actually, maybe not. I am sure there are other things I’m going to have to deal with between now and then to do with the holiday so will keep you up-to-date over the coming months, as usual I hope you enjoyed the read.

Latest News And Ramblings Of My Life 23 March 2014

Firstly I must apologize to people about the delay in posting on here, its just that life seems to of been so busy the last couple of months as, some of the things I hoped to do this year seem to be getting closer to happening after all sorts of setbacks, more details in other blogs, plus other new doors seem to be opening in other ways, so off we go hope you enjoy the Blog.

Those that know me will have heard me many times talking about this Safari. I am one day going to do in Africa. Well after lots of thought. It looks like it might finally be happening, hopefully in July of this year, it will be to South Africa for nine days, what I intend doing is writing a blog about the ups and downs of planning the trip, but then to tell the story as I get nearer and then ultimately let you know how I go on with the trip.

The other thing I have been trying to sort out since my son’s 40th birthday was to finally get round to indulging his wish to go to the Grand Canyon, this will fit in with my interest in visiting Las Vegas, well it looks like this is finally going to happen this year, but is now become a much more interesting and exciting trip than originally planned, guess what I’m going to write a blog about it. How this seems to have taken over my life at present despite the fact the actual holiday is not until much later in the year and has become a sort of round the world trip, so more information to follow.

At the start of the year my life seemed to be going along a fairly even keel with not too much to challenge me, but a plan to make more of my life and to find interesting new challenges. Well, that seems to of happened, now the problem is how to fit everything in, given the restrictions on my health.

Last year, I was introduced to Mindfulness, some of it I feel I have taken on board and have done things to change what and how I do things. Sadly, I find it difficult to stick to the exercises which I am sure would help me even more, unfortunately I have always struggled with sticking to exercise regimes, maybe partly to do with the ME that I have and poor short-term memory.

I also joined the local U3A and now attend regular meetings, as well as joining the photography group and found this is opened all sorts of new and exciting experiences for me, the latest being a trip to London this weekend which was to visit the world wildlife photographer of the year show at the Natural History Museum, but more of that in you’ve guessed it, another blog to follow soon. The group was looking to creating a database of members, by coincidence I was aware of a product that would suit their needs, so became involved in creating this with another of the members, who was now taken it to something much more sophisticated and complex, which seems to be serving the committees needs. About a week ago I got a phone call asking did I want to be the new database manager, well-being, the shy, retiring person I am, I immediately agreed, fame at last, and only after asked the details of what I would need to do. It also seems that I need to join the committee so that I can have access to the members details, so reluctantly have done this. Speaking to the chairman the other week, he was delighted that I had joined the committee, which gave my ego a marvellous boost, err uum, no, it was so there was another male on the committee, as well as himself so we will have to see.

It looks like it’s going to be the year of committees for me, as I am now on our local ME support group also, mainly because they were struggling, good or bad I don’t have a role with them other than to add useful suggestions, attend meetings and other odd tasks. No, wait a minute, I am doing a similar exercise for them for their members database as well as creating a resource database for them. This will help people to find out what resources are out there and how to access them within our ME group. I’ve also joined the Facebook group for our ME group, which has a mixture of very serious and fun discussion on a day-to-day basis. I forgot to say I have a new friend on Facebook, much brighter than me by the name of Filbert Bear, I feel very privileged that he has befriended me has been giving me such helpful advice on a whole range of subjects.

From the Facebook section for the ME group, I have come across a couple of really excellent blogs, one is by a person call Smallfry182, I really enjoy the blogs that she writes, she seems to have a natural talent, although I am not sure that she would believe that, she tells of the ups and downs in her life, she seems to have the ability to write about her life as it is, with the ups and downs, but with a sense of irony and humour that makes it an enjoyable read. If my writing, has made it interesting for you, then below is the link to her blog, I am sure if you are into blogs and learning about people and their lives. This will be a good read.
http://smallfry182.wordpress.com/author/smallfry182/


Well I will leave this for now, because I have to do a blog about this weekend’s trip and then over the next few days, maybe finally start working on a blog about the Safari in July and my other trip towards the end of the year, as usual I hope you have enjoyed the read.

2 Feb 2014

Which Box Do I Fit In 2nd February 2014


Over the last few weeks in conversations with friends and posts on websites with cyber friends, I have realized that many people seem to think that I fit in a series of boxes and/or stereotypes, often I do not challenge these presumptions, because first of all, why would I, secondly trying to explain to people that I am a much more complex person, can in itself be quite boring and confusing, as well as repetitious and lastly does it really matter.

Maybe rather than boxes I should use words such as stereotype, label, partly because these are broader I would hope, possibly it is a series of boxes or labels, but some totally contradict each other, so how does that fit in. What is interesting, is that when I tell people I am a Gemini and they have any slight knowledge of astrology and/or the signs of the zodiac, I then acquire a totally different label which is,” Oh that explains it, you’re the ones with the split personality, Jekyll & Hyde” personally, I do feel there is something in this, but it’s only part of the story.

Only today in discussion with friends, we were talking about my interest in musicals and where it came from, well I don’t really know, I do remember as a child listening to the Light programme on a Sunday, I think it was Benny Green’s programme, that talked about the latest musicals, also the history of the subject, it even opened with the Carousel waltz as its theme. Maybe I was brainwashed, possibly it was my dad’s fault because we used to watch Fred and Ginger, Frank Sinatra, Gene Kelly, Gordon McRae and Jennifer Jones in musical films, I will always remember my first big-screen musical Oklahoma at the Apollo in Wide Screen Todd A Ho,. But there again, I enjoy Nat King Cole, The Drifters, Glenn Miller, locally I enjoy listening to Affetside Choir, who sing a mixture of standards and more modern music. So now the box has expanded, what does it say about me now and my Musical taste.

In the last week or so in one of the Internet chat rooms that I inhabit, it was interesting to read people’s comments when I offered to meet up with a lady from the group and escort her to one of the other groups that I attend, as it was her first meeting with the people and she wasn’t quite sure, even the whereabouts of the building. People used words such as “gentleman” “pleasant” “kind” “caring” which did no harm for my ego, on that occasion I would most probably have ticked those boxes, but I have to be honest and say that there are many other times that I can be “thoughtless” “inconsiderate” would you believe “rude” well, yes, all of these are true, plus many other failings. Those that know me must be aware I am a chatterbox, but there again, what about all the times people say “do you mind if I ask you” or “what do you think” when seeking advice. Some more confusing boxes you see to describe me.

What about a totally different area, many people know, that I have been involved in social work in the past, in fact I am still, although retired trying to use my skills to assist others. It’s the looks of amazement when I mention in passing about jobs that I’ve had in the past. Some of you reading this will be aware that my career has had some strange twists and turns. Just to tell you some of the jobs I’ve had, I started out as an apprentice electrician, but gave that up after a couple years, I then went working as a tenpin bowling engineer towards the end. moving on to management, for about five years,I had a brief period doing maintenance in bingo clubs. I had the largest career change, when I worked in nightclubs as stage manager/ DJ for about two years,, I met many, at the time famous people, lots have died, or been forgotten since, e.g. Gene Pitney, Fame and Price, Stan Kentons band, The Comedians well known on TV at the time,. Next there was a period with what is now Scope, teaching young adults basic engineering and social skills to help them cope in the community. Oddly, this also lasted about five years. After a brief period in engineering, moving on to becoming first a signalman with British rail, then the clerk that sold you your rail ticket. So yes, quite a varied career, did I make the moves because of a change of interest, not really. Just seemed the right thing at the time, but can you see again, the lack of pattern and the inconsistencies with those boxes.

I was talking to a friend who I travel with last week, he said, as far as he could see from observation and conversation that I had little interest in art galleries and museums, and if I did visit them, spent little time in them. In a way he could be right, locally I think I have only been to the art gallery and museum twice, in the last 20 years,, neither time to view the exhibits. When in the company of others who want to visit museums, often I spend only a short time looking at the exhibits, if they are of little interest to me. All goes to show that he must be right. Well, as with most things, this isn’t quite right, it’s those stereotypes and boxes coming out again, you see, I pick and choose when and where I wish to indulge myself in these sorts of places. For example, the Science Museums, locally and that in London, I could spend hours and hours and hours in looking at the exhibits. But recently I went to the British Museum in London, and because of the noise, crowds and limited interest, after two hours I had had enough. Last year, as some of you will know I went to Bergen in Norway and visited an art gallery there, enjoying a whole range of works of art, that I had never seen before, maybe it was to do with an acquired interest in one particular artist, or maybe it was just the start of something new. My interests and hobbies have changed over the years and I hope I am not closed off, but open to new experiences, some that will give me pleasure others that I will choose to take no further, so what does that say about me again. Maybe sometimes what we see is not really a reflection of what is actually happening, but also depending on what attracts my attention on a particular day will totally change my view or interest sometimes.

When younger, I always wanted to meet that perfect girl who could put up with me, I would marry her and we would have children, then living happily ever after. I think unfortunately this came over in relationships. I had as a young man, I was the sort of person that mothers wanted to marry their daughters off to, but the women found people like me boring, there was no excitement. Another few boxes there to put me in then. Well fate decided something else, and one day the girl I was going out with(someone finally took pity on me LOL) informed me she was pregnant, subsequently she had our son, but decided to go on her own path and finish with me. Maybe I should say to be fair, I was not in love with her, but felt I should do the right thing, could be that’s why she finished with me.

In later years, what was fascinating was when I told people about my son, who sadly I was not seeing at the time, people seemed to think, it impossible for me to have had that sort of relationship, I must admit, it came as a bit of a shock to me at the time. I still wanted to meet that perfect person and have that perfect relationship with children to follow. I eventually did marry, but sadly there were never any children, apart from my stepson and some contact with my own son when he grew up and married, with his wife and children. So, unfortunately, even the boxes I wanted to tick did not work out, but why did people think it was so odd and didn’t fit their understanding of me that I could have had my son outside of marriage, I never said I was that well behaved.

In the 1990s I acquired a new box for people to place me in, I became ill with ME/chronic fatigue syndrome, which had a massive impact on my life in every way, including my marriage, employment and quality of life in general. I still have this health issue, but now I have a whole range of other things to put up with. Well, the new box is, Disabled, its quite ironic really, given the work I had done with people who had a disability and the range of people I worked with as clients in hospital, helping them to come to terms with their treatment, illness and prognosis. I always felt at first it was a temporary thing, and would quickly go away,

20 years on I still have that initial illness, plus as I say other health issues to frustrate me and my quality of life. I remember one day being at home some years ago, when my stepson came in with his friend and him saying ”that’s my dad . He’s a bit disabled” well that’s a box isn’t it, I suppose, in actual fact it was correct, but it didn’t make me feel any better. I have tried to ignore when possible, these labels to do with disability, but sometimes, like being paid benefits and having my blue badge, because I fit the official label of being disabled, it helped me in the real world, by at least enabling me to be part of society due to the money and resources available because of my health issues, .when I feel able to. What makes it more confusing is that on a good day I look and sound okay, so people treat me as “normal” on a bad day, nobody sees me, because I stay at home and rest, this must be confusing to those who do not know me well enough, and sometimes even to those that do. I do not feel my disability defines me, but it can be a convenient box, at times, both for me, but also for people I meet along the way. But I hope people can see that I am still in there trying to cope and get on with my life, in my own way.


Well I hope you have enjoyed the read, also that maybe, it will help people to think about putting people in boxes and stereotyping them, something I try not to do, but have to admit on occasions I am as guilty as everyone else, but will try harder in the future.



21 Jan 2014

A Glass Half Full Or Is It, an update on how my health has affected my life over the last few years. 21st of January 2014


Recently I read blogs by smallfry182 http://smallfry182.wordpress.com/author/smallfry182/ and her mother soxandcinders http://soxandcinders.wordpress.com/2014/01/18/i-was-once-normal-how-it-all-began, regarding their experiences with ME/Chronic Fatigue Syndrome,(I must apologise as I have not worked out how to post links yet) which have prompted me to post an article on here that I originally wrote back in 2006,(please see below) about how to cope with ME, based on my own experiences. After thinking about it I have now decided to provide an update of what has gone on since that time and how I am coping these days with the condition. Also how other health issues have impacted on my life in both positive and negative ways.

Back in 2006, I’d given up my job of 17 years and was working for a small charity part-time doing telephone advice on social and welfare issues, providing independent social work reports and acting as an advocate to a range of people through the organisation. I feel that my own history of health issues since the early 90s made it easier to assist people in the course of this work. Also at work I had gone through various assessments and provision of equipment to make it easier for me to carry out tasks, what is interesting when I look back is despite all of these assessments and equipment how often the experts got it wrong. I was supplied with a chair for work that I later discovered despite the fact is a cost of thousand pound it was not supporting my back correctly, the first set of computer equipment and voice recognition software never worked properly, it was only as I discovered more about my needs that I finally acquired the equipment that would help me best.

I had been treated by Raymond Perrin the osteopath since the year 2000 on a regular basis and my ME was much improved, many of the old symptoms disappeared, such as problems with perfumes, strong lighting, loud noise, also I was eating a more varied diet, unfortunately I started having problems due to arthritis of what I thought was sciatic pain. At some point in this period he referred me to the physio Gail Sumner, who also had ME, but who had managed to recover and now was treating people for the condition as well as for normal health issues. Because the sciatic pain did not cease my GP prescribed a drug called pregabalin, which seemed to ease the pain, unfortunately it seemed to dumb me down even more than the ME and I was constantly falling asleep, even at times whilst sat at the work computer. The GP referred me to physio at the local hospital, who put me through a four-week course for back problems then discharged me. Both the physio and osteopath were unhappy with this and felt I needed an MRI scan, I therefore paid for this privately after seeing a consultant also privately, he explained I had a condition called spinal stenosis as well as a prolapsed disc, that I should have been referred to him by the physiotherapist, so he was willing to treat me under NHS. He explained that he would try injections and if they did not work he could then operate on me to resolve the spinal stenosis He did injections that did not seem to work into the spine, on the second occasion these worked, but I was still having pain in my lower back he said this was to do with the disc but he was reluctant to operate on this because he could not guarantee the pain would disappear.

During this period I had realised that my marriage was not going on a path that I hope for, we were spending less and less time together and both of us were unhappy. Because it had worked in the past I decided to go for marriage counselling, my wife chose not to go down this path for whatever reason. One of the things that I took on board from the counsellor finally, was that the only person we can change is ourselves, for better or for worse, that by our making changes there was faint hope that the other person may also change but not to rely on this. I decided in the end for all sorts of reasons to move out of the family home, initially for a trial period of six months. I explained to my wife that this was no the person, that I felt the marriage was going nowhere and that may be having time away from each other would be helpful to both of us. Initially I went into lodgings which were not very successful. I actually found the quality of my life otherwise improved and in the end decided because my wife seem to be stuck in her lifestyle to seek a divorce. This was a painful experience for both of us I felt because we were both experiencing health problems. She stayed in the family home and I moved into a small council flat. My ME actually seemed better at this time, maybe because some of the stress had finally abated, but also because I was now seeing the physio Gail Sumner on a regular basis and she was also treating me for my arthritis which I had previously attributed the pain of to my ME.

It was during this period that I discovered a website called sagazone, it was for us over 50s to chat on, write blogs and share thoughts and feelings. I had never been into this sort of thing previously so was quite wary, I came across some quite unpleasant people early on, but through reassurance of other members of the site stuck with it, initially writing blogs as well as reading others, I came across this Scottish lady, who now lived in Holland who wrote under the name of honeycook, her blogs were a joy to read and we became cyber friends, as time went on I joined in various chat groups on the site and eventually even met up with some of the people, some who’ve become good friends. There was even a part of the site for those of us with ME and Fibromyalgia. I also got chatting to a lady in Hawaii of all places who also has ME and we have been in contact occasionally over the years.

I’ve actually found that this new cyber life opened all sorts of doors even when I feel not particularly well, that I can chat to people who are in a similar situation, where we can offer mutual support but also at times to meet in the real world, I have also met a range of people who don’t have health problems, where I can join in as and when I feel up to it but at other times resort to the websites such as Facebook to communicate with family and friends decreasing the social isolation. Sadly saga zone closed down, I was amazed how bereft so many people were at the loss, having said that new sites have been created and people fortunately had already often made contact outside the website already.

Around 2008 I was finding I was getting quite breathless but could not understand quite why, after extensive investigations it appears I had angina, I could not believe this is I have never had apart from one occasion any symptoms such as these headaches the people seem to suffer. When talking to my GP she explained because my exercise tolerance is so poor I was unlikely to ever do anything that would put my heart under that much pressure, not sure that says a lot about me. Eventually I had stents fitted to my main left artery, the problem was between my ME and arthritis I was unable to carry out the rehab programme so I have never been able to obtain a full recovery.

I am not sure quite what happened with my ME because the symptoms seem to of abated to a great degree and generally I do not now practice the exercises I used to do daily, instead I seem to have more and more exercises to help cope with my arthritis throughout my body, at present I am seeing to physio’s every 2 to 3 weeks privately, which fortunately I can afford because part of the cost is reimbursed through a scheme I belong to. When discussing with the physio about this I did ask where would I be now without the treatment, in her opinion my body would be much more locked up with much less movement and either more pain or increasing doses of painkillers, so I think I will continue with this treatment. What I struggle with is why I find it difficult to commit myself to the level of exercise that I know would improve me. At one time I saw someone who taught the Alexandra technique, everything he said about posture etc all made sense, I was seeing him weekly and paying for the privilege, why then did I choose not to go with his recommendations, I don’t know if it’s an ME thing or some other reason, but there does seem to be a consistency in this.

I finally gave up work in 2009, based on the orthopaedic surgeons recommendation, that sitting at the desk and using the computer was not helping my spine, because I had been placed on incapacity benefit for life back in the 1990s, despite the fact I had chosen to continue working, so was unable to receive this. My presumption was I would quickly be assessed then receive benefit to make up for my lack of wage. Sadly my timing was poor, a new benefit had been brought out called employment support allowance, with much stricter rules and poor assessment criteria. I will make a very long story short (quite unusual for me) and say eventually after lots of hard work I finally was paid the benefit until it reached retirement age. I do feel for those who are not used to the benefit system the endless paperwork and the poor decision-making that is taken causing much distress to many people who should qualify. It’s quite interesting that at a time when more and more people are struggling to claim money from the state that they are entitled to, that the funding to many organisations who would have provided help and advice has been cut so drastically and that now there seems to be an agenda in this country, that benefit claimants are fraudsters and should be sent out to work whatever their situation, let’s hope one day common sense will once again prevail. Most of the people I know who are ill would love to return to work but unable to do.

When I retired I continued to work with a number of clients who was still on my caseload until their are issues were finally resolved, it helped me in the transition and I was supported by my previous employer. At the same time I started to look for other things to do, and started to have more holiday breaks in pleasant surroundings where I could indulge my interest in photography and travel as well as working with the local shop mobility scheme. During this period in 2010 I started with another health problem, this was to do with kidney stones although I was not aware of this at the time, on the first occasion I experienced pain the like of which I had never had in my life, which resulted in me having a series of short stays in hospital over a number of weeks. Fortunately this eventually abated but resulted in further investigation by urologists, three years later I ended up having an operation on my prostate. I had felt that this was going to be an extremely painful ongoing issue, but amazingly I suffered no pain, apart from whilst in hospital when there was a blockage on a number of occasions finally all this calm down and I was discharged from the Ward. Unfortunately whilst I was on the Ward the man in the next bed who was elderly and had some form of dementia, had many problems mostly down to a lack of attention by the nursing staff, although I should have made a complaint whilst on the Ward I left it until after discharge, I do hope that by doing this it will have helped other people to receive a service.

I had been a member of the local ME/CFS group since the mid-1990s but had had a break for a number of years as I found it difficult to hold down a job and attend meetings. When I retired I started again attending and because there have been changes in the group decided to play a more active role, one of the difficulties about our sort of group is that there are few people who have the energy to carry out the tasks that make it successful. Fortunately over the years despite that much good work has been achieved, I decided that it was time that I gave something back to the organisation sort now have taken on more responsibility through the committee. I am not sure where this will lead yet, but is good in that it helps keep me motivated and involved in supporting others with the condition.

Three years ago I came across a former client who wanted advice from me about his mother and the fact she had been placed in care. I became involved thinking this would be quickly resolved, nearly 3 years on a decision was finally made by a court that she should stay in care, I have supported the young man as his advocate over this period, attending all meetings with him, solicitors and court hearings. There has also been issues regarding the funding of the placement, unfortunately this is still not been resolved fairly as far as we can see, so I am battling on with this element. What I had not realised was how much of a toll this would all take of me, part of me says it’s time to finish it and get on with my life, because the son has little involvement these days, but bloody mindedness says I should fight it through to the conclusion, at least for the benefit of other people in the future.

I find it harder these days to deal with tasks both physically and mentally, it is made even worse because I had always been independent and sorted out many things myself, whereas now things such as decorating I need others to do for me, but do struggle with the fact it is so hard to find a good reliable person to carry these tasks out however much they charge. I find things such as the TV and the recorder much harder to cope with, particularly when if I fast forward on occasions, the sound is lost for no apparent reason on the TV and there is no quick fix. I find the ever-changing things such as email on my computer harder to cope with, and this voice recognition I am using, due to poor short-term memory, that however clever it is, not being able to use it in the sophisticated manner it’s possible to do, quite frustrating, is it down to the ME, is it I am getting older and falling behind in technology or is it all part of life.

Despite all the above, I do feel my life is not so bad, in the last 12 months I have had a range of good holidays as you can see from my previous blogs and at present I am planning another two this year, my health is much better than some others and I have enough food and warmth at home, plus a range of friends and acquaintances to keep me occupied. More recently I have joined a new organization U3A and enjoy the mixture of people and experiences there, I have even joined their newly created photography group which is opening new experiences for me.

Therefore, where would I be if I had not had the ME, I just do not know, would I have been more successful, would I still been married, with my quality of life been even better, I’ve chosen in life not to look at these issues. Because what would I achieve, I have made mistakes along the way and presume I will continue to do so, at present life is not so bad. Let’s hope it continues to be so.

Thanks for taking the time to read this blog.

A Beginners Guide To ME 21 January 2013

This was originally written back in 2006,but updated with the help of Caroline Higson recently

I have read other peoples comments elsewhere & hope that my thoughts may help some who are new to the condition, having had ME for about 20 years & actually finding I have improved over the years, but am not fully recovered. I hope the information listed may help others along this difficult path.

Firstly try to find a sympathetic GP who has some interest & or insight into ME, I have learnt along with my GP over the years things that can be useful for me, the largest is that she is willing to listen and not write me off, remember you can change GPs if they are not helping, also it is possible to complain about poor service from them.

Accept that your life is going to change, often drastically, but that
ME will not kill you in itself.

Explore if you have other co-existing conditions that are treatable, I discovered as others have, that there are other health issues that could affect how ill we are and the pain and distress we deal with. I have arthritis of the neck & spine as well as RSI in my right hand & arm. Certain exercise & massage help to relieve the pain to do with the arthritis; the RSI I feel is made worse by using the computer so much. So please do think about the time you spend sat at a computer.

The new answer is technology & voice recognition. What a relief it was to find there
were other answers. Therefore this takes away some of the stress & pain that I related
inappropriately to ME, I struggle with remembering the more complex things it can do, but once set up it makes the task of writing so much easier. I use Dragon Naturally Speaking

Try to find some way to develop a more positive attitude, mine was to laugh at myself & the stupid things that I did & do even now, rather than withdraw even more, leading into greater unhappiness. Never forget that you are still a part of society and you still have a whole range of knowledge skill and experience to offer.

Be open with people about the condition & the effects it has on me, such as the fact that I need frequent breaks to rest & sleep even in my own home when we have visitors & that sometimes I cannot come out to play however much I want to. But also to allow me to decide as and when I want to test or ignore the boundaries.

To try to accept I cannot live life in the way I once did, setting myself impossible targets that others would never of expected in the first place of me.

To accept I have a disability, but then to obtain help to cope from all sorts of sources such as

Obtain a Blue Badge

Apply for a concessionary bus pass or taxi vouchers

Explore Shopmobility schemes

If employed apply to Access to Work for assistance as soon as possible, either directly or through your employer, even if self employed help is available

Claim PIP, Attendance Allowance & any other
benefits, but ideally let a professional assist with the filling in
of the form & the gathering of information to support the claim, but look at the Benefits and Work Guides

Ask for a Community Care assessment from social services, because you
are disabled & a Carers assessment for anyone who provides care to
you ( don't tell them initially what help you need that's their job &
you are entitled to the assessment by law).

Ask for an assessment by an occupational therapist or contact
Disabled Living Service in Manchester or the local branch where you live,to see what help is available in practical terms, such as bottle openers, chairs, bath aids ( don't
go out & spend lots of money when you may be entitled to these free
of charge)

Check out with others what sorts of treatments seem to work, beware
of expensive ones that nobody seems to improve from, or nobody else
has heard of. Personally I have been receiving treatment from Dr Raymond Perrin and Gail Sumner for some years and it has worked for me, but thats only my experiance

The biggy is try to PACE yourself & set realistic limits on what you
can do, yes you will have good days & sometimes get away with over
exertion, but if you have a relapse through bloody mindedness how
does that help how you feel ( boy do I know this one)

I found that a support network of people who I could ring & chat to even if I could not get out helped with the isolation, but also who would ring me made me feel valued.

Remember that you are still a person in your own right & not a victim, & are entitled to opinions & views about your life & society as well as the things that are important to you, despite the fact sometimes stringing a couple of sentences together may be difficult to do

I was reminded the other week that most of us did have a career & life before ME and some still do so we still have things to offer to our friends family work & society, although we have to sometimes pick when & where.

Obviously these are only some of my thoughts & may not be appropriate for others or maybe will provoke discussion, but at the same time I hope may ring a bell & help some along the path of coping with ME.

Guess what my back is now aching so will close but be interested in people’s comments.

6 Jan 2014

Thanks For Following My Blog

Hi Folks just wanted to say thanks for tasking the time to read the blog about the trip to Spain, I have now split it up and added photos in case you wish to have a quick look through, hopefully your interest will spur me on to greater heights in the new year, please feel free to have a look at past ones also I am trying to sort them out to make them more easy to look at

2 January Our Last Day And A Walk Round The Port


Woke up early, but Zorro had already left, he had texted from the airport to say all had gone well with his trip to the airport apart from his case nearly getting squashed in the lift. No sign of Brian so had breakfast and did some cleaning in the kitchen, this was when I discovered my charger for the tablet was missing, I searched everywhere I could think of in my bedroom and the main room with no success, I had a special battery pack that was supposed to provide a charge in emergency, the only problem was it did not seem to be working the only time I needed it. I e mailed Zorro just in case he had picked it up by mistake. Then got on with some packing.

Brian got up had breakfast and we did some sorting out and cleaning in the flat, then decided to have a good walk down to the port before returning to the flat for the last time. We had a mixture of food left so decided we would use this up if possible at lunchtime, unfortunately my cold was taking more effect as the morning went on so I was not feeling that well but did not want to spend the last day inside.

So off we went, unfortunately the weather was cool and overcast, the streets were quieter today as we walked, and there was the odd drop of rain. The port had looked very impressive yesterday from up the hill but not so this morning, maybe it was all the clouds, there were plenty of small boats at the marina but no sign of life on them, the ferry was loading lots trailers on, there was an attractive roof which created an effect of waves, when we reached near the end of the harbour Brian noticed the sea was clear enough to see fish by the harbour wall, from small to at least three foot long in a range of colours,

We had planned on stopping for a drink or snack but suddenly there was the odd drop of rain, the area was very open and I had nothing to protect me from the weather so we decided to walk back, there rain never started although it did get cooler, when we got to the front door we struggled with opening the front door, eventually we managed, at least it was to be the final time we would have to do this.

For lunch I put together an unusual combination of food based on what we had left, which comprised of an omelette, accompanied by sardines and tomatoes with a banana and apple to follow, we finished off cleaning up the flat I went and had a bath to help with my cold then went to bed after searching again for the charger, we had heard back from Zorro to say all had gone well on his trip to the airport and he was relaxing in the lounge.

Brian rested until I got up, we discussed the holiday and things that had happened, felt that I had learnt some things about what I wanted from holidays but part of this was different to the others, From my understanding Brian preferred a more leisurely approach, whereas I wanted to see as much as possible in the time we had. We talked about the fact they wanted to talk about the Spanish language watch TV particularly the news and discuss this and also the culture of the country. I said my holidays were a mixture of wanting to see different places and record what I saw to look back on in the future. I did say I had surprised at how often we had spent eating pizza rather than native food, maybe some of that was down to being in a self catering accommodation.

We finished all our packing and waited for the arrival of the owners daughter, unfortunately she had not arrived at 5 as promised so rang brother who said she would be with us shortly, she came we presumed she would want to inspect the property, but just returned our deposit, we then left, only to remember after we had left some food in the kitchen but it was to late to do anything about it, we walked to the station, bought tickets for the last time and boarded the train.

At the airport it was a fair walk to the check in Brian mentioned how long we had to wait, we found the counter for the baggage drop, but there seemed to be only one desk for two flights, so it took quite time before we reached the front, I do wonder what it is that takes some do long to sort out, we decided to find somewhere to have a snack, unfortunately we discovered that the only place was Burger King which wad quite ironic after the discussions we had had about using fast food places. I joined the queue, but there seemed to be an issue about payment by the people at the front of the queue, time wad passing, also one counter closed so again there was a delay before we were served, finally we had our Whopper meal. When we finished I checked and it was time to proceed to the boarding gate.

When we got there it looked like we were at the end of the queue, but at least it was moving forward, Ryanair had recently announced that passengers could now bring an extra small bag on board, this was interesting because when we reached the boarding gate others before us and myself were told at the last minute that our hand luggage wad to go in the hold so we needed to remove any valuables from it, well I had all my papers money and large camera, luckily I had carrier bags but the indignity of having to sort it out did not help. I will be writing into complain, both to them and Travel Which on my return, what was odder wad that they did not bother with Brian.
The plane was full but we found aisle seats which are better for me and settled in for the flight. This was uneventful until shortly before we landed when the plane was buffeted by the high winds, but we landed and proceeded to collect our luggage, the only issue was that the screens were not working do we did not know where to expect our luggage, a little later it finally arrived and we went to seek out our taxi. There he was waiting so off we set, there was a pleasant surprise in that Kate our friend who is his neighbour had kindly given him two lots of bread rolls and milk for us, what a lovely person, first Brian was dropped off then myself.
It was now gone midnight we had left the flat 6 hours ago, I was not tired so decided to sort out my case and letters, my cold was much worse by now, I did not sleep well despite painkillers, the next morning back to reality, sorted out washing and other tasks, but also a lot of the day in bed, the weather is cold wet and miserable, a long way from that left behind. I sadly being addicted to Emmerdale and Corrie have been trying to watch this whilst falling asleep in the chair, hopefully I will soon be over this cold and back to normal.

1 January 2014 A Trip Up To The Castle


Well readers thats the end of 2013 a very mixed year with a very long different ending to that which I expected, but back to the plot and the latest episode of our trip to Malaga. When I eventually awoke nothing was different, Zorro was sat at his computer Brian in bed, so made my breakfast and discussed plans for today and tomorrow, because he leaves early tomorrow morning for a month in Tenerife. He said he had things he wanted to do today, so would not be joining us when we went out. Heard a noise outside, it was a small group of young people making their way home, they must of been to somewhere formal and the men were dressed in dinner suits but by the look of them still recovering from the night before. Checked Brian ok and eventually he appeared had breakfast, he was still not right with his cold or virus, but wanted to go out.

I was going to charge my mobile phone but the charger has disappeared despite looking everywhere it seems to of gone, so was unable to chance texting or phoning people to wish them a happy new year, because I felt it best to conserve the battery for emergencies, but where is it I have used it whilst on holiday, lets hope it turns up bego5re I go home or I will have to buy a replacement, maybe I can order one online when finished tonight so I will not be stuck
We decided to see if we could find the path up to the castle as it would give very good views and photo opportunities, so off we set. I noticed that the streets had all been cleaned quite different to back home also that the rubbish was being collected from the bins, so different to back home on a bank holiday.

It seemed a long walk to get there but it was a warm pleasant day. eventually we reached the path and started to climb, Brian mentioned that the last time we were here I was reluctant to try the trip up, I did say since then I had had a stent to help with breathing but also this morning a strong painkiller to help with my back pain. He was struggling but I think it was down to the infection he had, so we had frequent rests on the way up but also took plenty of photos on the way.
The views were great at each place we stopped and there were plentiful viewing areas and seats to rest, plus a mixture of people from different countries, we could see the port, the bullring and the bays we had walked along on previous days.
Eventually we reached the top and castle, after discussion we decided to go in, one if the joys of being pensioners was that we paid a much lower price. I forgot to say earlier I had realised very unusually for me I had forgotten my water bottle but was needing a drink with the heat, there was no facility to buy on site, the only water was a dribbling water fountain, today they would of made a lot of money selling soft drinks. We again took lots of photos before deciding to go back, my suggestion was to take the bus but Brian wanted to walk, we reached a compromise and went down the road rather than the path back to the main road.

We then set off towards the botanical gardens, we found a small supermarket and Brian kindly bought me a bottle of water and a Magnum ice cream, so I could take a further pain killer, to help me on the walk back to the flat. We came across 2 sets of cyclists, as at home they were totally oblivious to pedestrians although I felt it wad not an area they should be riding particularly in such large groups.

Eventually we reached the flat I had a sandwich, then a bath as I was exhausted and went to bed for a rest, when I woke Zorro was doing e mail I think whilst Brian cooked us a pleasant stew to use up some of the food we had left then I did another omelette for Brian and I Zorro settled for salmon sandwiches instead. After we say for a while the others watched TV whilst I caught up with things on the Internet. Shortly after Zorro said good night and good bye as he will be leaving before we get up in the morning. Then Brian said he was having an early night also leaving me on my own yet again, never mind, had a couple of e mails from Andy to day he is following my Blog, do that makes at least one reader LOL.

So here I am sat in the living area at the tablet, tonight listening to Nat King Cole as I one figured type this, its coming up to 11 here and there is nothing I can make sense of on the TV so I think shortly I will have an early night, as usual readers thanks for taking the time to read the story.

I must apologise readers for the delay in posting the end of the story, this is down to the fact that somehow I managed to mislay my charger for the tablet, I searched everywhere for it on the last day and again when I got home, plus my friends have checked they did not pick it up, also I did not have a spare charger or connection cable. Also I had acquired a full blown cold possibly the one Brian had and am finally feeling up to the task of writing up the end in the early hours of Sunday morning.

31 December 2013 New Years Eve A Different Beach To Explore


I will start at the end for a change today as its new years eve, I do realise when I am typing this its still not midnight back home, but here its 29 minutes past and I am sat here all on my own, bangers keep going off outside, the good news is that although its a quiet area there are two police cars outside a little down the street.
My two friends retired to bed earlier, I am not into Spanish TV and all my friends seem to of disappeared from the various websites. I would of gone out to see what the crowds are up to but we are still having issues with the lock on the outside door, so here I am sat at the table, at least its warm in here and I am listening to Burt Bacharach as I type.

Earlier I rang my friend Anne back in UK for a chat,(its times like these I really appreciate mobile phones) update and a bit of company, she unlike me wanted to be on her own over the holiday period, we talked about back in the 70s when we first knew each other and rang each other to cope with being on our own and how different it would be one day in the future, well here we both are 40 years on both on our own with nobody for company, well not quite true I suppose she has sleeping cats and I have sleeping friends LOL, where did I go wrong, or maybe this is as good as it gets, at least I am warm and health is not to bad, apart from the pain killers for my bad back

Back to the plot Zorro and I had a lie in no sign of Brian when we got up, had breakfast then checked at 10 he was ok, which resulted in him getting up, we decided to walk down to the port and have a walk along the front, since I was last here they have extended the port do was a longer distance before we reached the promenade.
I walked a little by the sea, it was so quiet without the traffic noise, eventually we came to an area for us oldies to exercise,
I should of used tablet to take photos of us children playing instead you will have to wait until I return home readers. Near to there was a very large high chimney, with an even larger one in the distance, we later learnt these were all that was left of a factory, the larger one had a device for measuring time inside.
The others felt they had walked long enough, plus they resisted my suggestion of a trip to the nearby Burger King for a Gigantic Whopper so we wandered down the backstreets seeking somewhere for a sandwich. By good luck we came across a small cafe that seemed to fit the bill, the young lady waitress spoke no English so between my sign language and Zorros Spanish we enjoyed drinks and sandwiches. From there I suggested we find somewhere that do cakes to finish off and or an ice-cream.

Zorro led us to the main supermarket where we stocked up with more food for tonight and possibly the rest of our stay, unfortunately we did not find cakes or ice-cream unless we bought a number. As we walked along we noticed a number of people lay down by one of the offices, Zorro mentioned the fact that none seemed to have alcohol, rather water milk or juice we carried on and eventually found a place, we each chose a different one, again there was a strange group of people near one of the churches, going by the mixture and clothing we wondered if they were waiting for some sort of food or other hand out, a sad sign of the times, as we were now tired we went back to the flat, I had a bath then a sleep, whilst the others did tasks on their computers. When I got up I assisted Brian with preparing the meal, which turned out a great success followed by our cream cakes, we then relaxed for a while before as already said they went to bed.
Its now 1.30 and bangers are going off still, its odd there seem to be no pretty fireworks lighting up the sky, I am not sure if we are over the worst or it will get noisier, so going to have a quick look at other sites before I try to sleep

I hope you are enjoying the read and I wish you all
A Happy New Year